Sunday, April 8, 2012

Word Of Advice To President Joyce Banda


I should start by congratulating you madam president on your constitutional appointment (whatever the right term is) as the first female president of Malawi. Not only do we have the first female president, we also have the first gentleman, retired chief justice Richard Banda. We will now have a safe fatherhood project campaign.

This is a memorable event in the history of our nation, SADC and Africa. You will now be brushing shoulders with the likes of Zuma and Mugabe. They can be bullies sometimes but don't be intimidated, they are your peers now and would only want to show their macho. Zuma is a polygamist so naturally he won't be a problem unlike his friend Mugabe who would want to sell you his philosophy. Watch out for him. Of course Sata should be very happy and looking forward to seeing you soon. People like Bashir should be told in the face to keep their trash cans within their borders, we have enough local garbage to deal with. This is no time to keep on offending the Queen and the west.

I read in a newspaper sometime back that your excellence and madam Sirleaf Johnson of Liberia are good friends. My word of advise your excellence, only photocopy the good things from her, the bad stuff should go straight to the shredder.

One important item which should be on the agenda of all your cabinet meetings, regional and international summits, is the Shire-Zambezi waterway project. Your first outside trip should be to Mozambique. We need to improve our relationship with this neighbour. When you go there please cry, beg, bow to let them allow our barges sail through the Zambezi. Otherwise Mota-Engil will become a shareholder of a new company called Malawi.

Madam president I also noted during your first press briefing that you were accompanied by your husband and lawyer Ralph Kasambara. One realises that you have plenty of free legal advice. When you choose your cabinet include people who have a clean CV socially, politically and of course academically. We don't want to see stories on ministers in The Weekend Times. This paper is for action girls not action ministers. I would be pleased to see Ralph in the cabinet, the guy is brilliant. I hope he will still be interacting with Malawi on the social networks and stop removing past posts on his timeline.

Recycled politicians like BJ should not be included in your cabinet. The same applies to the likes of Ntaba, Vuwa, Kaliati, Dausi, Gondwe and whole bunch from the former cabinet. If you would like to choose any from amongst them, do the selection carefully but DON'T include the above personalities. The only way these people can change is through genetic mutation.

It is good that MPs are defecting from the yet-to-be defunct DPP but you should not take this, and the support you have from Malawians for granted. The landslide victory Bingu had in the last elections is what corrupted his line of thinking.

The country has a lot of problems namely; forex shortage, fuel scarcity, power blackouts, water shortages, lack of drugs in public hospitals, inflation, bad laws just to mention a few. My humble request madam president is that you should dedicate your time to these issues and serving the people of Malawi. Otherwise you may end up also being the FIRST president to have the SHORTEST term.

Lastly madam president, the machine at Macra; it is said that it is a snooping machine. Only yesterday it was spying on your phone conversations. What are you going to do about it? Use it on Peter and Callista maybe? Not a good idea, is it?

May I finish by once again congratulating on your presidency. I have great expectations from you and hope that God will grant you the wisdom to rule Malawi wisely. I wish you good health and a successful political career. So help you God!

May the soul of president Bingu wa Mutharika rest in erternal peace.