Word Of Advice To President Joyce Banda

I should start by congratulating you madam president on your constitutional appointment (whatever the right term is) as the first female president of Malawi. Not only do we have the first female president, we also have the first gentleman, retired chief justice Richard Banda. We will now have a safe fatherhood project campaign.

This is a memorable event in the history of our nation, SADC and Africa. You will now be brushing shoulders with the likes of Zuma and Mugabe. They can be bullies sometimes but don't be intimidated, they are your peers now and would only want to show their macho. Zuma is a polygamist so naturally he won't be a problem unlike his friend Mugabe who would want to sell you his philosophy. Watch out for him. Of course Sata should be very happy and looking forward to seeing you soon. People like Bashir should be told in the face to keep their trash cans within their borders, we have enough local garbage to deal with. This is no time to keep on offending the Queen and the west.

I read in a newspaper sometime back that your excellence and madam Sirleaf Johnson of Liberia are good friends. My word of advise your excellence, only photocopy the good things from her, the bad stuff should go straight to the shredder.

One important item which should be on the agenda of all your cabinet meetings, regional and international summits, is the Shire-Zambezi waterway project. Your first outside trip should be to Mozambique. We need to improve our relationship with this neighbour. When you go there please cry, beg, bow to let them allow our barges sail through the Zambezi. Otherwise Mota-Engil will become a shareholder of a new company called Malawi.

Madam president I also noted during your first press briefing that you were accompanied by your husband and lawyer Ralph Kasambara. One realises that you have plenty of free legal advice. When you choose your cabinet include people who have a clean CV socially, politically and of course academically. We don't want to see stories on ministers in The Weekend Times. This paper is for action girls not action ministers. I would be pleased to see Ralph in the cabinet, the guy is brilliant. I hope he will still be interacting with Malawi on the social networks and stop removing past posts on his timeline.

Recycled politicians like BJ should not be included in your cabinet. The same applies to the likes of Ntaba, Vuwa, Kaliati, Dausi, Gondwe and whole bunch from the former cabinet. If you would like to choose any from amongst them, do the selection carefully but DON'T include the above personalities. The only way these people can change is through genetic mutation.

It is good that MPs are defecting from the yet-to-be defunct DPP but you should not take this, and the support you have from Malawians for granted. The landslide victory Bingu had in the last elections is what corrupted his line of thinking.

The country has a lot of problems namely; forex shortage, fuel scarcity, power blackouts, water shortages, lack of drugs in public hospitals, inflation, bad laws just to mention a few. My humble request madam president is that you should dedicate your time to these issues and serving the people of Malawi. Otherwise you may end up also being the FIRST president to have the SHORTEST term.

Lastly madam president, the machine at Macra; it is said that it is a snooping machine. Only yesterday it was spying on your phone conversations. What are you going to do about it? Use it on Peter and Callista maybe? Not a good idea, is it?

May I finish by once again congratulating on your presidency. I have great expectations from you and hope that God will grant you the wisdom to rule Malawi wisely. I wish you good health and a successful political career. So help you God!

May the soul of president Bingu wa Mutharika rest in erternal peace.

THREE PLACES TO VISIT IN MALAWI

I stumbled upon a book in a second hand shop titled “A THOUSAND PLACES YOU MUST VISIT IN THE WORLD”, I have forgotten the author and I am not sure I have gotten the title right. Please do forgive me for that. The book lists the best places one must visit in the world and unfortunately for Malawi, the book only lists Nyika Plateau. I don’t know what criteria the author used to come up with the list but I would have loved it had the author included two more places, these being Lake Malawi and Mulanje Mountain.

I am a great fan of Nyika National Park and I can easily see why the author listed it, the scenery is just splendid, talk of the Orchids (wild flowers), zebras, roan antelopes and the rolling hills, Nyika is paradise on earth. It has the second highest place in Malawi, Nganda Hill. At Nyika one can enjoy guided horseback safaris and camping. Want to know more, why not google the place out?

Lake Malawi is the third largest lake in Africa and the tenth in the world in terms of area, and the second deepest in Africa and the fourth deepest in the world. It has more than 250 unique species of cichlids (locally known as Mbuna) found only in its waters. Its fresh crystal clear waters make diving and snorkelling an experience to remember, with the mbuna fish in different colours swimming all around your face mask, you can even feed these little fish from your hand. No wonder David Livingstone called it “the lake of stars”. If water sports are not your thing then why not try out sun bathing on the unspoilt sandy beaches of Cape Maclear? You haven’t been to Lake Malawi if you haven’t tasted the succulent Chambo fish, a delicacy of Malawi. Just ask the chef at your resort, he/she knows how to make the perfect dish to tickle your taste buds. A cruise on the colonial times MV Ilala won’t be a waste of time either. It was built in Scotland and is one of the oldest vessels in its class still plying the waters of the world. It is the only means of transport for the local population along the northern parts of the lake and Likoma Island. Major events are the Lake Malawi international yachting marathon and the Vinspired Lake of Stars international music festival. The music festival is scheduled for October. Places to try out are Cape Maclear, Senga Bay, Nkhota-Kota, Nkhata-Bay, Likoma Island just to mention a few.

Mulanje Mountain is the highest in Central Africa and the mystic appeal of Sapitwa peak cannot be over emphasized. The arrogant few who ignored the advice from the locals not to climb the mountain without a porter or guide have succumbed to its mystical powers; lost after losing their bearings in the mist which covers the peak or spooked by the angry spirits of our ancestors perhaps unhappy with the intrusion into their resting place. This is a place for the dare-devils who don't mind coming back dead or alive. The major event is the Mulanje Mountain Porters race. Porters compete by racing up the mountain tracks and back. I have never been to Mulanje so I can’t recommend any places in particular but I know there are some nice lodges in Mulanje like Kara O Mura country lodge. Satemwa Tea Estate just on the road to Mulanje, has some cottages where you can enjoy horse rides sightseeing the tea estate and surrounding areas.

Next time you visit Africa, don't forget to visit Malawi and try out these three places. You won’t find the experience they provide anywhere else in the world, and yet there they are; prone, untapped, unspoilt and little advertised, for you to explore. The friendliness of the people is unsurpassed and I just heard recently that we are the happiest country on earth.

Welcome to the warm heart of Africa.